Review – Free Agent
5
  • Posted:
  • August 17, 2014

Free agent

I’m just going to leave this here…

I wasn’t afraid of your average dark alley. I had standard Agency-issue spells in my coat and a nine millimeter in my purse for dealing with the less dangerous pests, but even I knew you have to be careful with an upset woman.”

Page 3, Free Agent by J.C. Nelson.

The loading bays down at the end of the alley didn’t look too promising, and now Princess PMS rose to her feet.”

Page 3.

She didn’t look like a princess. She looked like a college intern for a radio station. Five foot three, strawberry blonde, and a complexion that could sure as hell use work. Plus she was packing the freshman five on her hips, along with the sophomore seven on her thighs and, well, you get the idea.”

Page 7.

I’d have loved to be beautiful. To have flawless skin and a nose that didn’t look tiny, or eyes that didn’t look like my father was part bat. Grimm said that men loved my large brown eyes. I didn’t. I wanted blue eyes like Mom and Dad, but you didn’t get a say in genetic roulette. If I ever got to go home, I was planning on asking Grimm to change my eyes to be like them. A push-up bra and a firm running regimen were the other components of my beauty treatment. To be the wrong woman you didn’t have to look great, just available and interested.”

Page 14.

I had been up for three days straight and for my answer I invented the Leperochaun, a little man who carried disease, hoarded gold, and, worst of all, was Irish.”

Page 21.

All of these statements are printed in the mass market paperback (ISBN: 9780425272671) that released July 29, 2014 from Ace Books, New York. The statements all irked me in one way or another. They are either sexist (exhibiting negative body-shaming imagery or gender stereotypes), racist, and pejorative.

I do not enjoy reading a book that promotes any of these things. I will not be reading the rest.

This book has been stricken.

0 stars.

– BP

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5 Comments

Adelynne

2014-08-17 23:23:56 Reply

Wow… what is this book even about??

    bibliopunkk

    2014-08-17 23:27:13 Reply

    A woman named Marissa who is an indentured servant to a man named Grimm who runs an agency that helps out fantasy people and mythic creatures for hire. Think fairy tales and Once Upon a Time meets Urban fantasy. I think it’s supposed to have a hard-boiled quality to the writing but it just ends up coming off as abrasive and cruel rather than self-deprecating. Great premise, terrible execution.

Anya

2014-08-20 21:31:26 Reply

Fuck this bullshit, I couldn’t even stand to read more than the first two quotes. Glad I didn’t request this one!

    bibliopunkk

    2014-08-20 22:37:38 Reply

    The best part, Anya, is it’s a female character narrating. And I could almost on some level ignore it if it were not written by a man…

Anya

2014-08-20 22:49:52 Reply

Yeah, I was confused about how anyone could think a woman would narrate like that but I guess I shouldn’t have been too confused…. This is why I prefer reading female authors!!!